No.996208[Reply][Last 50 Posts]
File: 1571896829812.jpg (58 KB, 650x650, 1:1, aXm7064xjU.jpg) ImgOps Exif Google
Alright so...this thread. Not sure how to start this thread really. 365 posts and 244 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.
I want to make this thread as an attempt at a type of group therapy. The reason for this is that, while many of us had normal childhoods, and hopefully not too many bad things later in their adults years, I know some of us had quite messed up childhoods and/or are struggling as an adult.
I want this thread to be geared towards being able to talk about traumatic, or just bad, experiences throughout your lives. Maybe reflect on them, and find support in others and realizing you were not, or at least are not now, alone in things.
Please only talk so far as you feel comfortable. I'm sure people will get questions about things, or asked for further explanation, but you do definitely do not have to go further if you don't feel comfortable.
Please be as supportive as you can, I'm sure some of us come from backgrounds and cultures with beliefs that may seem cruel or wrong to an outsiders point of view. Please don't mock those views, but rather try to, if you must, just state why you think they might be harmful and leave it at that.
Try and remember we are not doctors or psychologists, this is just for support, understanding, and maybe discovering something about ourselves.
File: 1577997524565.png (345.19 KB, 1280x720, 16:9, large.png) ImgOps Google
I think that's a little bit misguided, or misinterpreted. Finding validation in yourself is being happy with yourself, and a part of being happy with yourself is having friends and family that validate you. That tell you you are good and worth it, and your importance is just as important as everyone elses, and that you matter to them.
For some people it's easier to be happy and proud of themselves, but for a lot of people, we need another perspective, and love and acceptance from someone else.
File: 1577998529407.jpeg (150.64 KB, 1280x960, 4:3, pdp7.jpeg) ImgOps Google
Maybe it is misinterpreted, but I feel like it's the better idea too. the problem with needing love and acceptance from others is that you'll always need it. and worse is I've had the people that I thought love and accepted me reject me outright. It single handedly destroyed all my self esteem in a moment.
I actually had a time I felt wonderful and great. I was happy, chiper. I was losing weight. I felt like I belonged somewhere and people loved what I did. Yeah it was unusual to most, but I was able to be myself still and just... so happy and positive.
That literally all changed over a week. my own personal security being invaded, and then my own family basically telling me to put it all away.
Even 7 years later I feel it. And now I feel like I'm in a horrible spin of wanting to feel love and accepted and unable to get it, but also terrified of receiving it as it could be so easily taken away. and the constant back and forth destroying me but I can't give myself my own acceptance because the voices of childhood and my loved ones making me feel like I don't deserve it.
Well, I'm not sure what happened to you anon, but from the way you talk about it, it doesn't sound like it was completely fair. And it sounds like it caused you to fear that type of relationship with people.
I don't know what the solution to that is, but I know it can be hard to trust people, especially when you've been hurt. But to not trust anyone ever again is almost harder. So maybe there's a balance? Maybe not open yourself up completely, all at once? And if it backfires, then at least you only gave so much of yourself that you could risk giving.
As far as deserving things or not, well I seriously doubt that you are somehow not
deserving of love. That seems pretty freakin silly to me.