A few months a go, roughly a year or so, I was fine.
Now, every week or so, mornings where I feel nauseas and have to throw up given the collected phlegm and mucus my body can no longer process. This means I have to give up dairy due to some sort of "fibrosis" where milk = more phlegm.
Some mornings, it feels like my body "tricks" me. It wakes me up with the need to poop.
I figure, go to toilet then back to bed. But my guts are like, "Ah, you're up! Given I can't process mucus as I could before, let's make you nauseas so that you throw it up."
Control and Willpower against it just makes me/it wants to throw up even more. After the horrid ordeal, I'm too wide-awake to go back to sleep.
My recent ordeal was
>>1203602 where it felt like the "rules were changed". I was fine up until I got back to bed and immediately felt nauseas. It gave me no choice but to return to the loo to be sick.
I gave up refusing this to be the "norm" now, as well as the notions of "control" or "arrangement". I'm thankful I don't feel queezy or throw-up in the evenings, usually a first-thing sort of thing. But as far as I'm aware, by stomach can do this to me whenever it wants.
I hate it. I don't want this to be the "normal" of my current life and future... But this is how it is now. I still eat dairy products every now and again knowing full well will likely lead to early morning nausea because f**k this dictating me.
Other than that. Doing good.
