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Imagine that all current holidays were gone, but we needed some new ones to help build a culture.  You've been put in charge of coming up with a list of holidays.  What do you do?  What sort of holidays do you come up with?  What do you think it's important to celebrate?

Picture only sorta related.


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I'd say why in god's name was I chosen for this.


I can’t think of anything without offending someone.


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How about, water day!! where you have water?


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Halloween II: Friday the 13th
Dumb teens try to scare the shit out of each other and eat candy. Lots of costumes and stuff. Very original do not steal.

Pumpkin Hat: 3rd Tuesday in October
People make pumpkins into hats or make pumpkin shaped hats. Pumpkins are given to loved ones. Pumpkin hats make terrible gifts so it teaches you to be grateful for what you don't have.

Tree Day: in June. Picked by committee.
We acknowledge that there are trees. The trees are very symbolic and also metaphorical. Sometimes the trees are hypothetical.

April 18th
Pancake day. Self explanatory. The most commercialized holiday.

Moving Day: Some patriotic event
A day that people with disagreements with the government celebrate by using as a day for major chores like moving.

Voting Day: Patriotic day 2
Electric Boogaloo. Celebrated by forgetting to vote.


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Pretty sure we should celebrate that every day.


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i'd reinstate christmas. it's my favorite holiday, but i would definitely expand it to be more inclusive to folks, and with the plaque underneath saying "money is an acceptable gift"

we don't truly know when the new year actually is beyond our human concepts, so instead of new years, we have global adoption day! it would be the day that celebrates our acceptance of a full year of being on the earth! and we would start on 1 AGAD and go from there.

January is a dull sad month for most, but also the first true month that is not filled with a lot of holiday hullabaloo. so i'd instate a 2 week celebration and honoring of Cozy. wher eyou are encouraged to just be cozy in some way or another, and they will have hot chocolate, coffee, tea, and cider available at most local supermarkets outside the door.

february is the month of love for some, while a month of loneliness to others. now i am a romantic and would love to see some love, but i don't want it to feel necessary, but i don't want it to feel unaccessible.  So i'd call it the "RAINBOW OF LOVE" day! and if you are interested in finding love, you can wear a red bandana or bracelet, if you are looking for friendship, you can wear a yellow bracelet, and if you aren't looking for anything, you can just keep it blank. there would also be bracelets available in all the pride flags to signify who somebody is looking for, with even further markers for specifically boys, girls, or non-binary if need be. I know not every place is safe, so i'd have festivals pop up specifically for people to go to safely, with guards and security in case something goes awry

March would have Boondock Saints day, which is like St. Patty's day, but with added emphasis on the movie Boondock Saints


Eggs make no sense honestly, so let's go even further and make it omelette day. and instead of a rabbit, the mascot would be a jolly waitress that hands out omelette plates, and if you give her a good enough tip, all your family would be blessed with being called "shug" until the summer time ^^

May doesn't really have any holidays, so i'd have Will day. everything you have been thinking you "may" do, you instead WILL do! you WILL take that trip! you WILL have that extra slice of pizza! you WILL start working out!

June will have second christmas, on my birthday, it will be like normal christmas except warm, which will make it even better!

July is the 4th for the US, but not for everyone else. so we'd have international firework awareness day! everyone everywhere gets to fire fireworks off! you'd still have to adhere to local laws and fire bans, cause i know for a fact that being near forest fires and having to nearly evacutate SUCKS. so you'd have to find places where you can fire them off.

August is many peoples last month before school starts, so you get the "Dare to be Stupid" Day. your last moments to be stupid until you need to smart up again!

September will be about cats. 9th month, 9 lives, simple as that.

October will have Halloween still, but it's going to be emphasized to extend all the way through November, but not to exclude christmas, but rather to intermingle with christmas. November will then be the "Nightmare before Christmas" month and will be a hybrid jolly and spooky month with ghosts and reindeer alike!

and november will just have the day of EAT! it will be like thanksgiving, but international and not tied with a problematic history. you will still encouraged to be grateful and thankful to others, but you better EAT!!!

and that will be my list of major holidays <3


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Eh, how exactly and why would these holidays be gone in this scenario?

I mean, I know I'm over thinking the question but the reason why we have Halloween and Christmas is more than just age-old rooted traditions but what caused us to begin observing those traditions.

For example, if you peel back the top layer of Christmas you'll get Yuletide, peel that off and you'll get Winter Solstace, peel that layer off and you'll find families terrified over the fact the nights are long, the winds are colder and howling, the vegetations is dying around them and the world feels cold and lonely. So they appreciate what they have, they have each other and what warmth provided in their meager homes of wood and stone. Gift giving, feasts and merriment was what brought them joy and comfort against what looked like impossible odds of a dark and freezing world around them.

This is why I wonder how and why the holidays would be gone and why anything would take their place? For example in our modern world with modern comforts as well as less superstition and more reason governing our lives we probably wouldn't bother with holidays at all if we had no historic traditions to ground them. To forget the traditions of Christmas is to forget "how to christmas".

It's that kind of logic and thinking that makes me wonder if there really is life on other planets and if these alien planets orbit suns on an axis causing seasons on those planets, will there be winter festivals on those planets as well?


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Get rid of all Christian holidays.
Make all Islamic holidays public instead.

watch the political chaos unfold.


I'd distribute them evenly over the year and in a manner that should minimize the loss by weekend.
Everything else is whatever.


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I'm in favor for bringing back bread day because I could celebrate it at the same time as my birthday and who doesn't love bread


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Also not a holiday but in the old Norse calendar what is now mid-December to mid-January used to be a month called Mörsugur which translates to “fat sucking month” and I really think we should bring that back as well.


I think that's more of a renaming issue than a "bringing it back" issue because lord fucking knows folks get fat in December


Decompress day. Day everyone gets off just to relax and decompress.


You mean Decompose day?


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The "give me as much money as possible" day


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Yeah well then I'll instate the "Give ME as much money as possible" day the day after, and then you'll have to give me all the money you got on the day before!


The hypothetical does not say that we all get the power at the same time


My hypothetical does.

Pay up.


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I would just declare every 2nd friday a national holiday, not for anything in particular, but for the sake of 26 less working days a year.


I can get behind this

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