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The video game Crash Bandicoot is the worst thing ever created by humans.

The video game Crash Bandicoot fills me with a genuine, seething fury that no human being should ever experience.

If the video game Crash Bandicoot were on fire, I would not pee on it to put it out.

If the video game Crash Bandicoot were a person, I would repeatedly slam it's head in a car door.

The video game Crash Bandicoot is a reminder to all of us that a caring God does not exist, for if he did he would not allow the video game Crash Bandicoot to be brought into existence.


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>The video game Crash Bandicoot is the worst thing ever created by humans.

>The video game Crash Bandicoot fills me with a genuine, seething fury that no human being should ever experience.

>If the video game Crash Bandicoot were on fire, I would not pee on it to put it out.

>If the video game Crash Bandicoot were a person, I would repeatedly slam it's head in a car door.

>The video game Crash Bandicoot is a reminder to all of us that a caring God does not exist, for if he did he would not allow the video game Crash Bandicoot to be brought into existence.


Nukes don't make me this angry.


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You failed to state a metric to define how it was the worst. I put forth that nukes are worse for their damage to human lives in physicality, and how the remnants of it leave places desolated for years due to radiation.


Don't be a turd.


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I'm sorry you feel that way, Manley.


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I agree

Spyro is better


Haven't really played Spyro.


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That sounds pretty bad!


The worst.

I'll probably get the Spyro remake but I'm going to get Sonic Mania Plus this summer so it's going to be awhile before I can afford that


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I love Crash Bandicoot only the original trilogy created by Naughty Dog and the rest of the games developed by Sierra Games, Traveller's Tales, Viscarious Visions,  Radical Entertainment and Dimps are a total pieces of shit.


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Reported.  Yeah, of course i didnt.

I thought it was pretty good commentary.

Your memory seems to be failing.  Didn't you just post the actual worst thing ever created by man:  Atari 2600 Pac Man?

Omfg this looks pretty good actually.  I like the part where the whatever it is gets killed.


I didn't know there was any beyond the three on PS1

Bandicoot. And that's because the game has several unique death animations because all you do in this game is die.


So what's so bad about it, anyway?  Was I supposed to watch the video?


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Yes, Crash Bandicoot had manygames after the original trilogy Sony wanted to explode the popularity of the francise. In a beginning Naughty Dog only signed to make 3 games with sony and after those three games they didn't continue with crash and focus other things.

Sony had the brightest idea to hired many developers companies through the years  to make Crash Games but all those games were bad  totally bad and thanks to them, they killed franchise and it was on a hiatus between 2011-2016 with no news.

Until Sony and Activision decide to remaster the original trilogy.


its not that hard lol i 100%'ed them all


It's a collection of all the unique death animations. It's bad because it's hard as... There's no non-lewd joke I can make here.

Huh. I'll be honest, I never played the originals on the PS1. My little brother had Spyro, but I never played it all that often. We mostly played fighting games on my PS1. And I loved the shit out of the Spider-Man game.



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i 100% them all too, and got all the platinum trophies, except for Stormy Ascent

that level is evil



Hey Ella. Do you want to talk about how shitty Crash Bandicoot is?


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The therapist told me that I blocked those childhood memories out for a reason


Lucky you. What you up to tonight?


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Drinking tea and trying to catch you


You got me!


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I think I played crash bandicoot when I was a kidm I remember being really frustrated and switching over to donkey kong because it was funner.


It's a really hard game. I never played it before, so I didn't know. But it seems to be a game designed to make you die a lot and memorize the layout of a level. It can be pretty frustrating.

That's not the say Donkey Kong Country is easy, though! That game's super hard!


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I'm not sure which veraion of donkey kong I had, but I remwmber liking it because it was colorful and pretty.

I was also pretty young. I -think- I had it on the N64, but for all I know, it could have been the super nintendo.


Oh well, Donkey Kong 64 isn't that difficult. But I don't like that one.

I've never been into 3D platformers, especially not the ones that make you collect a bunch of shit. So I hope you were playing the SNES version.

I've been playing Donkey Kong Returns on the Wii. It's fun, but I really wish I could just use a normal controller instead of the Wii's waggle-controls.


>The wii


In all seriousness though, I can't remember. Which one was DK returns?

I know I had a few gameboys, Super nintendo, n64, and playstation over a period of years as I grew up.

I only really remember the basic games like mario and this weird lizard that made atupid jokes, but tlwas still pretty fun because I was easily entertained.

Oh and the monster truck racing game. I still get a lot of nostalgia whenever I hear the music.


>this weird lizard that made stupid jokes

Gex. He likes making dated references. A Lot.


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Oh my god, the voice actor got so disgusted with himselff for taking the job, he literally through up halfway through the recording!


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He got paid. And he plaed Gex in two more games somehow!


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I love Gex!


Gex is played by a stand-up comedian named Dana Gould. Apparently he wrote some episodes of the Simpsons, but it was in season 13 so no one saw them.

No one likes Gex.


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Why wouldn't people like Gex?  He's a rad gekko who makes a lot of TV references and has a game that's almost playable.


>That's almost playable

I never got into the Simpsons.


I was into the Simpsons in the 90s. Everyone was. But I haven't watched it since the early 2000s.


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It's more than can be said for some mascots!


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What the HELL is that thing?!


What about it?


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That's a bobcat.  Probably from the west coast somewhere.


I got into that rather than the simpsons, lol


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Will...will it give me nightmares?


Futurama premiered in 1999, though. The Simpsons was on for a decade before that.

Only if you play his Playstation game


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Yea but I was born in 1991, so I was kind of too young for simpsons.

Or rather, I was watching a lot of shows I shouldn't have been when I was young XD

>Only if you play his Playstation game



Well, I watched the Simpsons as a kid, but yeah, by the time you got into Futurama, the Simpsons already sucked. You missed your window. Which is too bad, at it's height it was one of the funniest things out there.


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I remember enjoying his first two games.  I don't enjoy them now, they're clearly awful.  I have no idea how I managed as a kid.  I even beat the second one.


The first two Bubsy games aren't that bad. They're just sort of mediocre.

You enjoyed them because they had a lot of animations and voice clips, which was rare for games in the 16 bit era. You ignored the mediocre game play.


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I would probably get a kick out of it now that I'm an adult, honestly.


I'm probably gonna head to bed.


Nighty night.


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There's a lot about them I can still say is cool, just not good.  The art designs in both are pretty neat, there's some fun mini-games and items, and like you said the voice clips and animations are still quite novel.  I just find them frustrating to play anymore.

I guess it's also possible that there weren't a lot of better options back then.  Plenty of games in the early 90s were absolutely awful, so something sort of okay was probably enough to occupy me.  I guess I liked Gex for a lot of the same reasons, though going back to the pair, I find Gex to be a bit more palatable.


Why do you hate Crash? I mean, it could a bit more on the difficult side, but a difficult game is better than a game for babbys.

I love Gex, I have all of the games, even the original 3DO version.

Did you know that he's also an unlockable character in Mad Dash Racing for the original Xbox?


No, the game is TOO hard! All you do is die in that game. Not to mention, 3D platformers are always at a disadvantage because it's hard to gauge your jumps in 3D.

I didn't know that. I just knew of his three games. Is the 3DO version much different from the PS1 version?


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According to most people, the first is probably the hardest of the original 3.

The 3DO version isn't that much different from the PS1/Saturn/PC version, besides the fact that you could actually save your progress, rather than relying on passwords.


Oh, that's probably why it's giving me so much trouble. I'm playing them in order.

And yeah, it's weird to me that Gex is literally the only good game on the 3DO. Unless you want to play "Plumbers Don't Wear Ties".


How dare you mock the absolute perfection of videogame art that is Plumbers Don't Wear Ties.


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If "Plumbers Don't Wear Ties" is art, then so is this urinal!

Oh wait...


It is actually anti-art.


Is that like anti-matter? If you put art and anti-art in the same room do they explode?


Only if the artists are also present.


So what is "anti-art", is it like absurdist art, poking fun of human's tendency to look for meaning where there isn't any?


Uh... actually yeah. Good job!


I saw a video on Absurdist art after Adult Swim put out that "Too Many Cooks" video, and there were people trying to seriously analyze it. One I remember distinctly was from a guy called "Renegade Cut". And I was like "There's no deeper meaning to it. It's just a stupid thing they made. Stop trying to analyze it."

Turns out there's a whole art movement based on that very concept called Absurdism. Essentially humans have a tendency to look for deeper meanings behind things, even if it's just random nonsense. Absurdist art is a commentary on tendency. A work of art with no deeper meaning, but made to look like it does. So people will try and analyze it and make goofuses of themselves in the process.



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